Leaves and Lives

Leaves and Lives by Tessa Jade Price

When I see a bunny in one of the grassy corners of Madison streets, I feel a quiet connection. We both eat a lot of leaves. We both put a little weight on in the winter. We are both being hunted by ruthless predators. And, yes– we are both cute and fluffy. 

But the connection goes deeper than that.The leaves we eat grow from trees fertilized with the detritus of the rabbits and humans past. The water in our bodies cycle through oceans, clouds, and return again. We hold carbon and oxygen and release carbon dioxide and methane. There is a give and take.

My hair swirls in loose curls swaying like a whirlpool resting on my shoulders. The muscles that push and pull me through the day– lifting my coffee and hugging my family– will one day return to the soil to continue the circle of life. I eat leaves instead of flesh in my effort to coexist and reduce the pain of animals.

I believe that the Earth is an expression of the universe. Just as we all happen to be. There is a miracle in the material: a sampler tray of molecules swirling to gift us life, love, and pain. My queer and trans body -my woman’s body, often misread– is one such miracle. My body is complicated and stunning like the cosmos. The known and unknown blending every day. Change being the only constant.

My beliefs do not fit neatly into religion. Neither would I classify them as atheistic as I once had since the term is often used as negation of a set of beliefs rather than an affirmative belief. Rather, I find my beliefs grounding. I believe in ecosystems, from the determination of a house plant growing towards sunlight to the gleam of joy and hunger in my cat’s eyes.

My moral systems are centered around sentient life and coexistence with our environments. Previously, I would call myself a Humanist. Though given our collapsing ecology, that might be a bit anthropocentric. Biocentrist might be more accurate, reflecting my undying respect for sentient life. It is beautiful and it is real. 

We live in a culture where humankind is said to dominate nature as some sort of duality. The truth is more complicated. We exist in a neverending harmony and discord with nature. Pushing and pulling like a muscle betweens humans and the rest of the universe.

Queer bodies continue to thrive even when sociopolitical winds are at their most hostile. Like the rabbits surviving on the city’s foliage, we support one another and find ways to exist in such an unforgiving environment. Queer people also exist around the world. We are a key part of the ecosystem and will continue to exist, honoring those we have lost along the way.